Legal Representation for Adoption

Adoptee’s Scholarship Story

My name is Thomas Craig. I am a child of adoption, a former foster child, born to biological parents who were drug addicts, and was born cocaine positive. I spent the first year of my life going through cocaine withdrawal which we believe played a part in my ADHD, susceptibility to addiction, and other habits. Today, I am currently a second-year student at the SIU School of Law, as well as a Graduate of Southern Illinois University, Edwardsville, and the recipient of a phenomenal DCFS Scholarship. 

This scholarship allowed me to attend 5 years of my undergraduate completely free of all charges, including books and most housing. I have been asked to write this to inform and help other foster children and adopted children how to achieve a scholarship as I had. 

My eligibility for the scholarship began when I was born and put into foster care with my guardians who would become my parents a year later. As part of my application, I was asked why I felt I should receive the scholarship. In my essay, I addressed that I desired to become an attorney in family law to help children and others in the foster care system find loving families and reopen potentially closed doors to them later, as was done for me. I, unfortunately, do not have any single methods or steps to guarantee a scholarship, as the academic achievement was the driving factor. However, there is a more subtle piece of advice I wish to pass down. 

As stated above, academic achievement was imperative to acquiring this scholarship but, academic achievement is something that faces many obstacles. The most prevalent one I saw as a child of adoption, was an apparent stigma among my classmates that they associated with adoption. Therefore, if I had a piece of advice to give regarding how to achieve a scholarship like mine, it would be to ignore the stigmas curated by classmates in the early years of schooling. 

Growing up, many of my classmates in my developmental school years (kindergarten – middle school) often made jokes and jabs about being adopted. Additionally, bringing up that I was adopted prompted confusing sympathy from others, a reluctant “sorry”, as well as cruel jabs like the idea that I was not wanted. While not the case for some, I was adopted before I even turned 1 year old, so as far as I knew, my foster parents were my only parents, and adoption was the norm in my household. My brother is an adopted child. He and I share no familial DNA, but he is now and forever, always my sibling. 

My mother always told me, which I believe is important to all foster children and children of adoption, I was not wanted. 26 years later and she still tells me this. Your foster parents and adoptive parents wanted you. This was always my response to these remarks by my classmates, that I am no different than them. 

Now that I am older, the impacts of these kinds of remarks on developing children are noticeable, especially with all the new information we know about emotional traumas. This can impact schoolwork, which was a key deciding in my scholarship award. I fear that children who are not reminded of this simple fact, that they are wanted, suffer far more than those who are reassured. For those who are not, allow me; you were and are wanted.

It is my sincere hope that this small piece of advice can help some achieve their best self and secure a scholarship I could.